Is it a sin to be mad at God?

A good number of Christians think it is blasphemous to even consider that question. “How dare you say that?” they ask.

“Don’t you know God is the Creator of the Universe?”

“By His word alone, the whole world was formed, who are you, tiny worm of the earth to even consider being angry at God? He could smite you down!”

Yes I know He is Jehovah, the Lord of Hosts, the Lord most High, the Alpha and Omega, the Great I am that I am… but guess what? He is also our friend! And like all good friendships, we should be honest and able to speak our minds. God doesn’t want us to be terrified of Him, unable to ask Him questions or express ourselves. God wants to help us when we are confused. He wants to give us peace when our hearts are agitated and worried. God wants to be our friend more than anything.

The truest friend!

Many years ago, I was a frustrated teenager. I felt no one understood me, and to be honest, I didn't even understand myself! I tried friendships, and being popular in school, but still that empty gnawing void remained. Many nights I cried myself to sleep because I was tormented by a feeling of worthlessness and abandonment. It didn't help that there had been changes in my family and I was in a new city and new school.

No matter how much my parents tried, I just felt they didn't know what I was going through. I couldn't even bring myself to tell how I felt because I didn't even understand why I felt the way I did!
Then one day after school, feeling so depressed and at the brink of despair, I started crying again. This time more intense than ever, and as I did, I wondered
"Why doesn't anyone care? Why am I so desperately lonely? Why do I feel so useless?"

It's a matter of the heart.

Yesterday I talked about the Israelites ability to quickly forget God’s faithfulness in the past, as soon as they faced a new challenge. I really wanted to understand why these people who saw with their own eyes, how God punished the Egyptians with plague after plague could still doubt Him. Even after they collected as much as they wanted from the Egyptians, who had once being very cruel to them, they still doubted God. When they left Egypt, God’s angel went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night, to protect them and to give them a sign of His abiding Presence, yet they grumbled when they saw the Egyptians chasing them. I found it particularly provocative that these people who had been so maltreated by the Egyptians could say to Moses (and in effect to God) “ Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? Didn’t we say to you in Egypt, ‘Leave us alone; let us serve the Egyptians’? It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the desert!” – Exodus 14:11-12

Don't forget!

Its so easy to forget God’s faithfulness in the past, especially when we are facing difficult times. The Israelites were very fond of that. No matter how mighty God showed Himself, they were too quick to forget His ability to help them, when they faced a new obstacle. I think of how God miraculously orchestrated their deliverance from Egypt, and protected them throughout their journey from Egypt to the Red Sea. Yet they quickly began to lament and blame God and Moses when they saw the Egyptians pursuing them. Over and over these ‘stiff-necked’ people tested God’s patience by their unbelief, and often times they paid dearly for their actions.

Guard your heart!

Since I started following the events surrounding the terrorist attacks in Kenya, I have been crying and asking why?!! Why would someone see a child and shoot at them? Why would someone kill a heavily pregnant woman? Why would you shoot an innocent man who is so afraid and begging for his life? Why, just why???

I have no doubt these terrorists were not always so bitter and evil. They must have once been happy children, who had dreams of doing great and wonderful things. Sadly somewhere along the line, they allowed themselves to become twisted murderous savages by absorbing hateful ideas.

Say it!

DON’T WAIT UNTIL I’M GONE 

Give me my flowers while I can smell them, 

Hear my stories while I can tell them, 

Sing my praises, so I can hear ’em, 

Give me my medals, so I can wear ’em, 

Don’t wait until the day I’m gone, 

To put me upon a throne, 

Give me my propers while I’m still around, 

Don’t wait till I’m ’neath the ground, 

Let me live my history, 

Please don’t let me be a mystery, 

Let me feel the pat on my back, 

Don’t give it to me and take it right back, 

So if I’m such a jolly good fellow, 

Let me know that I’m now mellow,  

Now is when I need a friend, 

To show me love before the end,  

So don’t wait until I’m gone, 

Listen to my song.

---From Notes by Aaron Nevillle

I first came across a poem like this in a funeral many years ago. It struck me as odd that at funerals, many people would write wonderful tributes to the dead, whereas when they were alive, they rarely heard such kind words.

Why does God allow us go through the ‘hard’ way?

As a mother, I hate to see my child cry. I do everything to make him comfortable, but sometimes I allow him cry for his good. Just the other day, he wanted to play with a knife. He had seen me using it to cut some vegetables, and started asking for it. I told him gently it was not a toy and gave him other safe toys instead, but he refused. He cried and cried and begged and begged, wailing pathetically. Of course I felt sorry for him crying, it broke my heart to hear him cry so much, but I knew I would be a terribly bad mother if I gave him the knife.  From my son’s perspective, I can imagine him wondering why his loving mother would prevent him from having this new and different toy. 

When God seems far away.

When a woman gets pregnant, she often doesn’t feel the baby move for a couple of months. She knows she is pregnant because of the result of a pregnancy test and sometimes some symptoms. However for about four months she doesn’t know how the baby is doing because she can’t feel its movements. A decent mother doesn’t just say, “Oh well, since I can’t feel its movement, then I am not pregnant!”

The 'maternal' love of God

Like many Christians, I grew up hearing about the love of God. In fact I even talked to others about this love, but sadly I didn’t really understand the depth of God’s love until I became a mother. 

You see I grew up in a typical Nigerian home where dad was a bully.  I remember how terrified we always were as soon as we heard him drive into the house from work. We would quickly turn off the TV, stop laughing, become sober and pretend to be busy reading our books or involved in one house chore or the other.