Have you ever been in a position where you were mistreated for being good? It’s shocking isn’t it? You do good, you expect good, right? I found out recently that it doesn’t always work that way. Good things don’t always happen to good people, neither do you receive gratitude and accolades for being nice or for fighting a good cause. It can make us feel unappreciated, confused, angry and even determined not to help others in future but it shouldn’t be that way. We can learn lessons from our not-so-good experiences of charity and become wiser. These are some of the lessons I’ve learnt after being burnt:
Learn from your
mistakes: Could you have done things differently? Were you too fast? Or was
the charity done at a wrong time? Remember that as humans we are not always
right. Don’t beat yourself up about not getting it right this time, learn and
become wiser.
Perhaps you were presumptuous?
Well you might have perceived there was a need when there wasn’t one. The
recipient might have felt slighted as a result of that. And just because you
might want someone to help you in a particular way doesn’t mean another person
would want the same kind of help. It’s a good thing to ask beforehand if, and
how they would like your help, before giving it. You don’t want to be
embarrassed by a rude rejection.
Understand that some
people do not like help: For these set of insecure people, it makes them
feel inferior. It has nothing to
do with you at all. So don’t get upset, just calmly let them be, at least you
tried. Remember even Jesus was rejected by his own people and couldn’t help
them as much as He wanted because of their attitude.
Apply wisdom (know
your environment): Some situations could be a set-up to get you into
danger. If you are in a society where insecurity is rife, be very careful about
helping strangers. If you come across a situation that needs your help, go to
the nearest police station. Don’t try to be a hero, especially if you are all
alone, in a lonely place or at nighttime. The world is full of wicked and
heartless people looking for their next prey.
I pray God gives us wisdom to do the right thing at the
right time. Don’t let a bad experience turn you into an unfeeling and uncaring
person. I hope you are encouraged
by this poem by Mother Theresa:
People
are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If
you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind
anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some
unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed
anyway.
If you are honest and sincere
people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.
What
you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may
be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will
often be forgotten. Do good anyway.
Give
the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and
God. It was never between you and them anyway.
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